birth story

this whole story has some TMI in it, so keep that in mind! also, i really hope you like to read!


--july 12--

2am - went to bed. normal night.

5am - started to get light cramping. usually only got one here and there in the past, but these seemed like they could be timable, so i started to time them with a contraction app on my phone. they were about 5-6 minutes apart, and i thought this could be it. timed them for a few hours, ate breakfast, and took a shower.

9am - still had the cramping, so i woke erik up and said he might be a dad today haha

11:30am - went to the bathroom, and there was some brown blood on the toilet paper. called my midwife office at this point because i wanted to make sure everything was okay. i know red blood is bad, so i was glad it wasn't red. they asked a few questions, and got me in an appointment 45 minutes later.

12:15pm - had our appointment to see if i was in actual early labor or not. since i had JUST seen everyone at the office the day before, they were VERY surprised to see me! afterall, the day before, i was only 1cm dilated and 50% effaced! they hooked me up to a monitor that shows them remi's heartbeat as well as my contractions and how strong they are. at this point, they were a smidge stronger than at 5am, so i knew things were headed in the right direction. they also checked my cervix, and i was at a 2.5cm, and she said she could stretch it to a 3. amazing what one day can do! so, she asked if we had our hospital bag with us (we did, just in case), and then she suggested that i go to the hospital because she believed me to be in early labor. she also suggested that if we had time, to go home first, eat/drink something small since they wouldn't let me eat anything after admiting me into labor and delivery. i figured we still had some time to drive home first, so we did, ate some blueberries, drank a little water, and off we went to the hospital.

3:10pm - arrived at the hospital. by this point, my contractions were stronger, and still at about 4-6 minutes apart. walked to OB triage, they checked me in, and hooked me up to the same type of machine that i was hooked up to at my midwife office to monitor me for an hour. they also checked my cervix at the beginning. so, i layed there for an hour, having pretty strong contractions now, and erik and i both said, "i dont see why they wouldn't admit us".

WELL...

an hour goes by, and they check my cervix again. no progress was made. i was still at 2.5cm, so, they told us to GO HOME.

are you kidding me?! these contractions were strong enough to EASILY stop me in my tracks, make me nautious (i felt like i was going to throw up a few times), and were varying between 4-6 minutes apart. we live 25 minutes away, so there was no way we were driving back home since they said to come back when the contractions were a little more closer together or when i was getting 6 an hour (which makes NO sense since i was getting 12 an hour ALREADY. ugh.). so, we walked to the cafeteria (with me having to lean up against the walls every time i would get a contraction...) to try and waste time. i tried to eat a little bit, but i was so nauseous i couldnt eat much. i just kept track of the frequencies of my contractions on my phone.

6:08pm - after an hour and a half of being embarrassed in the cafeteria (trying my hardest not to moan loudly in pain), my contractions became 2.5-3.5 minutes apart, so we went back to triage to let the nurses know.

they looked surprised to see me so soon, but i was in so much pain. they put me in a room again to monitor me, and we were in there for 3 hours. 3 more long hours of very strong contractions 2-3 minutes apart, but i was so glad i could be in a private room to moan/groan/swear and not around a bunch of strangers in a public cafeteria! finally they came in to check my progress and they said i was about 4-5cm now and that they would probably let me stay and move me to a labor/delivery room. THANK GOODNESS. about 30 minutes later, a wheelchair arrived for me, and off we went to the room i would deliver remi in!

by the way, i know people say contractions are bad, but they are seriously SO bad. they are hard to describe. my best description would be to say it feels like you are getting smashed between two cars. also, you get really hot. my ears kept turning red lol...

10:15pm - got situated in the room and was told i was at 6cm, and that the anesthesiologist was notified that i wanted an epidural, but, they had to do some blood work and ask me a bunch of medical questions first. LUCKILY, i had already filled out the hospital pre-register paperwork at home and brought it with me because i think that cut down on a lot of the questions. everything still took about another 45 minutes so the anesthesiologist didnt arrive until about 11. then HE asked me a bunch of medical history questions, and had to give the whole legal big speech about the things that COULD go wrong with an epidural, all while i'm going through incredibly strong contractions and wanting to scream, "THAT'S NICE. SHOOT IT IN ME ALREADY!!!" hahaha...eventually he got started though, and erik had to leave the room which was a bummer. they said sometimes husbands faint, so they can't risk it. the nurse helped hold me though because you obviously have to stay completely still when someone is stabbing your spine with a needle.

the epidural was weird. not really painful? i guess compared to the contractions, not painful at all lol...it just sort of felt weird. a little stinging sensation, then a cool liquid sensation as he injected it in me. oh, and he did all this while i was going through contractions, so that made it even more scary/hard to hold still! but, it worked really fast, and soon i was in heaven!!! he also said how he gave me just enough to take away the contractions/pain, but allow me to still feel pressure because it's much easier to push a baby out when you can still somewhat feel what you're doing! i remember thanking him a lot hahaha...and soon erik was back in the room too.

11:45pm - two nurses came in and said they would like to break my water to get things moving. i said i didn't really want to do that because i heard there is more of a risk for a c-section because once you break your water, there is a time limit on how long baby can stay in there. turns out that time limit is 24 hours, and they said there is no way it would take that long to get her out. one of them said they got off work at 7am, and fully believed i would have my baby by that point. breaking your water is only something you dont want to do in the beginning stages of labor since it can take a long time until you have the baby. so, i agreed to it, but they said they would do it at 1am so that my body had a chance to do it on its own, and also so erik and i could have some time to rest since they knew i only had 3 hours of sleep the night before. well, yeah right! now that the pain was gone, i was back to being excited and i couldn't sleep hahaha...but oh well. i layed there and waited.


--july 13th--

1am - nurses came back in the room and broke my water! i couldn't really feel too much because of the epidural (which was fine with me), but i could feel a slight gush/drip of liquid. erik said it looked gross hahaha...the nurses also mentioned how they would like to give me some pitocin to get things moving, but i really put my foot down on this one. i did NOT want pitocin. one nurse understood more than the other, so she said she would let us wait/rest another hour or so, and see how things were going at that point. i agreed, hoping my body would just do things on its own! during that wait, i could feel some extra pressure down below. honestly, it felt like her head was traveling down, but i didn't fully know since i had the epidural. i just knew i felt a lot more pressure and that it sort of felt like i had to poop hahaha...

2:30am - a nurse came back in and said how the midwife who was on call that night was done delivering the baby at the other hospital and could come deliver remi if i wanted her to. YES!!!!! i was so happy to hear this!!! you see, it's first-come, first-served when the midwife or OB in our practice is working. some other woman went into labor before me, and she was at a different hospital, so the midwife went there. when that happens, the 2nd person gets the OB who is on-call. the one who was on call for me, i wasn't exactly fond of. first of all, it was a guy, and i really just wanted a woman to deliver. secondly, i had met this doctor at our 11 week appointment, and i just didn't like him that much. he was okay, but he was sort of all business, and i worried with me giving birth, maybe he wouldn't respect my birth plan wishes as much as a midwife would (for example, no episiotomy). so, when she said the on-call midwife could come, i immediately said, "YES!!!" she got to the hospital at around 3am, checked my progress, and asked me, "do you feel some extra pressure in like...your butt?" and i said, "yes...?" and she said because i feel her head RIGHT here! it's time to push!

3:20am - everything was quickly put together, and soon erik was holding one of my legs and the nurse was holding the other leg and they were cheering me on to push! when a contraction would come, they told me to give 3 pushes close together. as in, push REALLY hard, exhale, immediately inhale a deep breath, push really hard again, exhale, immediately inhale a deep breath, and push really hard again. you do this so that the baby's head can get past the pelvic area without scooting back up again in long pauses between pushes. once the head is past the pelvis, it just can't scoot back up. so, i did what i was told, and remi was born in 20 minutes! just like 5-6 rounds of that pushing, and she was here!

3:39am - the time that remi was born! it was amazing :) i had a mirror, so i could see her be born! it was so surreal watching myself push remi out. once her shoulders were out, they let erik grab her, so he helped with deliveing her and he placed her on my chest! it was SO cool that they let him do that!!! i remember looking down at her screaming little blue body in disbelief. i couldn't believe she was finally here, and i was holding this little gooey baby. things were sort of in slow-mo. i would look at her, then at erik, then back at her, and i think i just kept saying, "hi, remi! it's okay! it's okay, baby!" while tearing-up. i loved that moment. it was amazing.

the rest of the hospital stay went just fine, but i couldn't wait to get out!!! it was nice having the extra help around so i could ask any questions that would pop up, but i really wanted to go home and relax. the 48 hours that we stayed there felt like a week! and, we didnt really get a lot of sleep while there. funny thing is, it wasn't because of remi! she was fine, and slept pretty much the entire time! it was because the hospital staff would come in like every 5 minutes! nurses to check me, nurses to check remi, nurses to take remi to the nursery to get checked out there, housekeeping, pediatricians, food service, you name it, they were in there. they were always spaced out perfectly so you couldnt really get sleep lol...so i was ready to be done with THAT! at least remi slept through it all haha...at one point, i fell asleep and i guess a nurse came in to get my vitals (like they did once an hour), and erik told them to come back later because i was finally sleeping! lol...they said it was fine, and left.

i still look at her every day and can't believe she's finally here and that she's ours to keep forever. we're both so in love with her and can't wait to all have adventures together :) also can't believe she is 1 week old already today!!!

we love you, remi harper <3